Coffee Shop

Welcome, Welcome…

The Coffee Shop is a place where we as women under construction come together and build each other up. I know I cannot do this without you and we all need to be encourage to stay focused on our dreams and it’s difficult enough but being alone and not knowing what to do or what the next steps are impossibly difficult. I needed this when I was struggling to find myself, I knew I was ready to change but I didn’t have the tools to do so, here we will support one another and gain the tools necessary to move through our journeys to find what makes us uniquely perfect for the gifts God has given us. Any life stories of inspiration or life strategies that you have applied to bring you closer to your dream can be shared to help others to get to a place in their lives, or the challenges you need encouragement to overcome we are here. I know you know what I speak of when I say that the pain and imprisonment of the mind are real, and we have o shift our whole entire way of being to be able to begin living the life of abundance and happiness we were meant to have. Please share and encourage each other, one by one we will be free… I believe in you… start sharing some ideas and watch the magic happen.

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  Hey Hey Hey Ladies,  I have put some things together,  browse through these wonderful ideas because it’s all about doing things that make us happy sometimes. It feels great to gather and join with other women and encourage each other to live an enjoyable life, Come On Jump In  What Do We Have To Lose!!!!!!!!!

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THE BLOG

01/13/2015 05:21 pm ET | Updated Mar 15, 2015

7 Ways Women Can Lift Up, Not Tear Each Other Down

By Susan Skog

NISIAN HUGHES VIA GETTY IMAGES

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This is go time for women, as we collectively rock politics, medicine, education, the arts, and business with our women-strong wisdom, compassion and collaboration.

But women can’t become a truly unstoppable force for good unless we shake off an old shadow that holds us back: how harsh we can be to one another.

Who among us hasn’t suffered the sting of a woman’s snarky comment or workplace sabotage? Or experienced the ickiness of mean-girl shunning or lie-spreading?

Women heap an avalanche of abuse, discrimination and incivility on one another, from the boardroom to athletic clubs. As I work on a book about this topic, I read about a woman who said the “cool” women in her yoga class often shunned her, made snide comments and even ridiculed her yoga clothes. Big, downward, sad-faced dog.

Come on, women! We deserve better than this. We are better than this.

There’s too much progress to be gained right now for women to regress into mean, middle-school girls — especially as the world’s girls watch and model our every move.

“There’s a Wonder Woman inside every one of us,” as Diane Von Furstenberg has said. Let’s unleash her this year—to better support one another. To help our sisters, from Africa to Asia, realize long-overdue healthcare, safe water, jobs, and literacy.

To lean into the toughest conflicts around the Earth. To stop turning against and fighting with each other.

We can’t afford to fall back into outdated, destructive ways: when we hold one woman back, we hold all women back. And when we empower and support each other, we all go big. The world is calling for us to go big!

Here are seven steps for unleashing your inner Wonder Woman:

1. Shine a light on the shadows. There isn’t a big enough rug in the world under which this secret can be swept. Whether you’re a mom’s group member or an HR director, begin to end this problem by having a candid and hopefully game-changing conversation about it. Granted, this is as about as fun as having a botched root canal. But, like healing any wound, once this “taboo” topic is aired and out in the open, real change can happen.

2. Live from your own incredible worth. Express your own brilliance — don’t block someone else’s. Be an amazing woman. Unleash her now. To do good. To raise the roof. To be kind. To change the world. Be a superstar yourself, and you won’t feel the need to tarnish another’s star. As Bindu, an Indian actress popular in the 1970s said, “Women who understand how powerful they are do not give into envy over meaningless things; instead they fight to maintain the beautiful bond of the sisterhood. These are the real women who know that we need each other’s love and support to survive in this world.”

3. Advocate for zero tolerance. Our workplaces, health, and economy are drained by something we’ve avoided, pretended doesn’t exist, or justified. From coffee groups to conference rooms, stop tolerating abusive talk and behavior among women. If you’re a manager or leader, enforce anti-bullying policies. Retrain or remove workplace bullies, both men and women. If you’re being bullied, document the abuse, report it, and be clear about how you want to be treated. If you witness bullying, don’t hide the truth to keep the peace. And if you’re a bully, seriously, why? Learn how to exercise real power to have authentic friendships and respectful colleagues, not ones that loathe your presence.

4. Be a Wonder Woman with your wise words. Kudos to Reese Witherspoon, who asked: “Why do we have to tear other woman down to build another woman up?” And to author Elizabeth Gilbert, who recently posted herself on Facebook holding up a note: “DEAR WOMEN – BE KIND TO OTHER WOMEN! LOVE, A WOMAN.” Look, of course, we don’t have to agree with every woman. But we can stop trash talking about women’s appearances, parenting, or successes. Gossiping and snarky talk can be addictive and pass the time in a boring day. But they’re destructive. Find a legit feel-good fix. Find new friends, if necessary. Find your integrity.

5. Tune out media that glorify mean-women pile-ons. Let’s all stop feeding the media that glorify women being mean to other women. Cheers for Jennifer Lawrence’s candor: “When I watch these shows and I watch these women on these television shows pointing to [other] women and judging them and calling them ugly and calling them fat — where are we from? Why are we here? Why are we doing this to each other? Men were doing it hundreds of years ago, and now we’ve turned around and we’re doing it to each other.”

6. Applaud a woman’s success. Some women I’ve interviewed say they’re scared to share their successes with other women for fear they’ll be bludgeoned with their own victories. That’s insane. Don’t hold a woman’s gifts against her. An anonymous person once said, “Jealously is when you count someone else’s blessings instead of your own.” If one woman soars, it doesn’t mean your wings are clipped, or that there’s limited air space. We all came here to fly—fly far!

7. Even Wonder Woman has to rest. These work harder/faster times can shred us, making it all too easy to turn on one another. Slow down, breathe, and nurture yourself, if only for 30 minutes. It’s soul-crushingly tough enough to get through some days. Do we have to make it harder by crushing each other’s dreams and dignity? When we’re more rested, it’s easier to give a big thumbs-up to a woman’s ideas at work. Or hold the door open for a mom struggling with a stroller. And cheer for a sister on fire with her creation, whether it’s a painting or a product.

Actress Lynda Carter, who played the original Wonder Woman, said, “Wonder Woman belongs to us all. She lives inside us. She’s the symbol of the extraordinary possibilities that inhabit us, hidden though they may be.

“Perhaps our real challenge in the 21st century is to strive to reach our potential while embracing her values. She sees the good in everyone, convinced they are capable of change, compassion, and generosity. She’s kindhearted and hopeful, and she has a great sense of humor.”

Can you hear my Wonder Woman cheering for yours?

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CREDIT: Getty Images

The Secret to Living an Extraordinary Life

In the past, I’ve shared some profound wisdom that I have received from Tony Robbins including:

• How to Retire Rich,
• Creating Magic Moments,
• How to Increase Your Productivity by 200%,
• Eradicating Your Limiting Beliefs,
• Roadmap for Transformation

And while all of this wisdom has positively impacted my life in so many ways, there still once simple truth that Tony Robbins states so eloquently in Unshakeable:

“The secret of living an extraordinary life is to take control of the mind, since this alone will determine whether you live in a suffering state or a beautiful state. In the end, it’s all about the power of decisions. Our lives are shaped not by our conditions, but by our decisions.”

This is truly profound when you unpack what he’s saying here. Author Viktor Frankl, in Man’s Search for Meaning explained it this way:

“We must never forget that we may also find meaning in life even when confronted with a hopeless situation, when facing a fate that cannot be changed. For what then matters is to bear witness to the uniquely human potential at its best, which is to transform a personal tragedy into a triumph, to turn one’s predicament into a human achievement. When we are no longer able to change a situation – just think of an incurable disease such as inoperable cancer – we are challenged to change ourselves.”

Turning a Personal Tragedy Into a Triumph

I was struck by both Tony Robbins and Viktor Frankl’s deep understanding of the meaning we give life’s events. The same event can mean so many things to so many people – even unspeakable tragedies such as what Viktor Frankl experienced in the Nazi concentration camps.

“What I’ve come to realize is that the single most important decision in life is this: Are you committed to being happy, no matter what happens to you?” asks Tony Robbins. “To put this another way, will you commit to enjoying life not only when everything goes your way but also when everything goes against you, when injustice happens, when someone screws you over, when you lose something or someone you love, or when nobody seems to understand or appreciation you?”

In his seminars, Tony Robbins uses Nelson Mandela as the shining example of this philosophy. Here’s a man that was in jail for more than a quarter century of his life. If someone wrongfully incarcerated you for 27 years, you’d have ever justification to be bitter, resentful, hateful and depressed. Instead, Nelson Mandela studied the language of his captors and planned how he would use his personal tragedy to bring global attention to apartheid and oppression everywhere. He rose above his personal tragedy and turned it into a triumph at a global scale.

Said another way, in life you have two choices: Better or Bitter. You can’t control what happens to you (or your business), but you can control how you feel and how you respond. In Unshakeable, Tony Robbins shares the secret of living an extraordinary life by showing you how to take control of your mind. What you focus on, you feel. And when it comes to financial stress, there is nothing quite like the extreme emotion most of us have experienced when a market crash occurs.

Living an extraordinary life is about ending the mental suffering you feel when events outside your control occur. Because, as Tony Robbins puts it, “life is just too short to suffer.”

Meet icons of entrepreneurship at this year’s iCONIC Tour in NYC and LA! Speakers include Daymond John, Arianna Huffington, and Michael Dubin. To learn more visit iconic.inc.com.

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The opinions expressed here by Inc.com columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com.

PUBLISHED ON: JUN 15, 2017

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